Wovon beim Erwachensprozess oft nicht gesprochen wird - this is often not talked about in the awakening process
Wenn die Erkenntnis sehr tief geht, werden Emotionen oft ungefiltert erlebt – bis hin zu jenem tief vergrabenen Urschmerz: dem Gefühl der Abgetrenntheit, des Nicht-Geliebt-Seins. In diesem Zustand fühlt man nicht mehr aus der erwachsenen Perspektive heraus, sondern aus einer ungeschützten Offenheit – ähnlich wie ein Kind.
Man kann sich nicht mehr dissoziieren – es ist, als würde man zur Emotion selbst werden. Strategien zur Distanzierung greifen nicht mehr. Egal was man versucht, die Emotionen lassen sich nicht mehr aufhalten. Immer wieder wird man hineingezogen – mitunter sehr intensiv.
Was es in solchen Phasen braucht, ist die Bereitschaft, immer wieder alles zu fühlen – gegebenenfalls mit Begleitung. Es braucht Raum für Ausdruck und Verarbeitung. Und es braucht Geduld. Viel Geduld. Und manchmal Mut.
The usual coping mechanisms – such as dissociation and compensatory strategies – normally create distance from such intense feelings. They serve as emotional buffers and are part of what is commonly accepted as "normal" in society: a collective form of dissociation as protection from our original sensitivity.
At a certain stage of awakening, however, these defense mechanisms stop working. You begin to feel everything again – fully, intensely, to the core. Childhood traumas resurface with full awareness, no longer numbed or filtered. The carefully constructed adult control system seems to fall away.
Dissociation is no longer possible – it feels as if you become the emotion itself. Attempts to escape or manage these feelings no longer work. No matter what you try, the emotions return – again and again – often with overwhelming force.
This is not a mistake. It’s a natural part of the inner process. And yes, it is deeply challenging – especially when juggling work, family, and everyday responsibilities. The mind tries to maintain control, to manage and protect. But it cannot understand this state, and so it sounds the alarm. This can create intense inner tension: a conflict between the mental control system (which responds with panic, fear, even terror or existential dread) and the old, suppressed emotions that now surface – such as helplessness, shame, vulnerability, abandonment, and powerlessness.
This inner struggle is real, and it can feel unbearable at times.
What’s needed is a willingness to feel – again and again – whatever arises, preferably with support. Space is needed for expression and integration. And above all, patience. A great deal of patience. And at times, courage.
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